"Go through the forest...", they said, "...it's a shortcut!" Shortcut my arse, when I get out of this pickle I'll be paying those stupid little bears and their treehouse village a visit. Burn that sucker down, make a new fur seat cover for the Super-Hog, have a barbeque...
I gotta get my head back in the game and focus on Shelob and her boyfriend here. Where'd that come from? I don't even know who 'Shelob' is.
The glowing blue one is spewing more than just acid, that sucker's been mutated. As for blackie, just big fangs, big attitude, and judging from those markings, I bet big venom to boot. And I hate regenerating from venom, ugh.
My sword and shotgun are back on the bike but I've got a few tricks up my sleeve, time to bust out a few riffs on the axe and fry these suckers. I wonder what giant spider tastes like? I'm guessing it's not like chicken.