Monday, August 8, 2011

Massive Mutant Squash

I had no idea what I had when I planted this stuff in the ground. Apparently it wasn't just a squash, but a giant Indian variety of squash from the Kerala region. This plant is probably not even properly registered with customs. You can't make this stuff up.

It's no gourd, that's a lot of edible veggies in there. That's my coffee maker in the background, and you can see the diameter of the squash itself is about that of the bottom of a pot of coffee. The largest of the two had to have weighed at least fifteen pounds. Maybe I just solved world hunger.

I cooked it, ate it raw, fried it, and pretty much whatever else you do with squash. It was decently good, I mean it was squash after all, when the last time you were excited about squash? I was happy with the growing process though, this thing really took off from day one. Here firstborn struggles to heft the mighty squash!


  1. LMAO they look huge well done sir

  2. My god man! Blur those things out. Those are too graphic even for the Internet!

  3. Too graphic? I guess it's a good thing I opted not to post one of the pics where I got creative with the largest of the squash specimens.

  4. If you start an underground squash fighting circuit, let the competition grow a little, then unleash these bad boys, you will clean up.

  5. Tennis must have worked for you since squashes cannot get that big so you must have gotten small. There are only so many ways to eat squash and one that size might be hard to give away around the office.

  6. Wow dude .... that is crazy .... were the seeds in a wrong package ? Or did a shady mystic on a cool looking donkey give em to ya ?

  7. @Spacejacker: Dude, USF is going to be the next hottest thing!

    @Christian: To quote an annoying phrase, "I know, right?"

    @Brad: Ha! I'll take that as a possibility, as for the tennis, err, check back on the 13th.

    @Joe: I know, right? Haha, okay, enough of that. You know when I said that these might not have been reported to customs? That was half a joke. My foreign neighbors gave me the seeds from an unmarked brown envelope and said, "These are very popular in India."

    They may be hallucinogenic.